My husband is enlisting for the first time into the army. We've been married for three years and have never been apart for a single bit of it. I'm 22, he's 23. We're approaching this very suddenly, and very fast. I'm proud of him, truly! But... I'm afraid. I plan to move with him when he gets stationed after his basic and AIT. We have no idea where he'll end up yet so I can't plan ahead and speak to anyone. Until he passes his physical and ASVAB this Monday I'm hesitant to talk to a lot of people asking for emotional help before it's even signed!
Can you tell me some things of what to expect/prepare for as a newbie to the military scene? Are there things I can do to get ready for the inevitable move, and the mounds of paperwork I've been hearing about? I lack the traditional support system, as my own family is deceased and has been for many years. That's actually half the cause of a pre-existing anxiety condition, which this isn't helping!
Really, any advice is appreciated.
Jacqueline's Response:
Congrats on becoming an Army wife! We are thrilled to have you in our sisterhood. I am sorry you don't have a traditional support system. That's not totally uncommon these days but I can see how that can increase anxiety. I hope we are able to support you and help you in any way you need!
I think that wives in your situation usually have the advantage in that you get to see the process from day 1. I knew my husband and we were great friends when he enlisted but we were teenagers and didn't get married or start dating until after he graduated from basic. So I have never experience these "ground floor issues" that you will be coming across. There will always be crazy paper work thrown your way but after a while you just get used to it. Its nothing too scary. As a new Army wife who will be separated from her husband for the first time ever I do have a huge recommendation for you. Try out the Army Family Team Building classes. These classes can be done online or in person on Army posts. Its a great thing to do in the beginning when you have free time because it introduces you to military life, the lingo, protocol...basically a survival over view so when things come up in the future you have an idea of where to turn.
Its hard to really prepare for everything that military life will throw at you. But since you all are at the beginning of your journey there are some things you can be doing so you feel ready for the next step. After your husband leaves for basic try to down size some of your possessions if you plan to live in post housing or an apartment. This is good to do no matter what though because even if you buy a decent size house near your first duty station just the move can be a pain! Get organized while you can so when he graduates and is there to help you guys can have some fun too. Also, make the most of your time at home. It could be a while before you know your next duty station so spend these months going to your favorite local attractions and hanging out with the friends you will miss when you do move, wherever that will be. Then when he does call and tell you your exciting future home will be Fort ________ you can start researching all the local places you want to explore with your husband when he gets time off.
Since I didn't get to see my husband through the basic training stage I never new this but apparently many units have photo groups on flikr so you can stay updated on what's going on. You should also get newsletters and emails to keep you in the loop so you don't have to go at this alone :) Your new duty station will also have a Family Readiness Group where you can meet and hang out with wives from the same unit. Just take things a step at a time and enjoy it! This lifestyle can be an adjustment but its completely worth it and will bring you much joy and growth, and even more closeness as a couple as you support each other.
Let us know if you have any other questions we can help you with!
